It’s my ego. That voice in my head that has both destroyed and rebuilt me. That invisible force you can’t see, can’t touch but feel in every damn fiber of your being. It’s both the weapon and the target, the driving force and the downfall. People talk about ego like it’s some dirty word like it’s this thing to be crushed, silenced, chained up in the basement, and left to die. But they don’t get it. They don’t know the strength it takes to wrestle your ego into something useful, to learn from it instead of letting it ruin you.
When you stand up to your own ego, it’s like staring down a beast that knows all your secrets, all your insecurities, every damn crack in your armor. And it knows just where to hit to bring you to your knees. Ego knows your weaknesses because it is a part of you. When people say, “Check your ego,” they don’t mean to obliterate it. They mean get control over it, own it, shape it into something that works for you. Because if you let your ego run wild, if you let it control you, then it’ll break you. Trust me, I’ve been there.
I’ve lived in that place where my ego ruled everything, where I was so full of myself that I couldn’t see straight. My ego was a constant companion when I was younger, whispering that I was invincible and could do anything without consequence. It told me I didn’t need anyone. It was my ego that told me I was above the rules, that I was smarter, stronger, better. That voice pushed me into some dark places where I was forced to learn the hard way that ego, left unchecked, is a ticking time bomb.
When I hit rock bottom, I thought that was the end. I thought my ego had finally won, dragging me down to a place where I couldn’t see any light. But what I didn’t understand at the time was that it was the start. Because when you’re lying there, stripped of everything, when you’ve been humbled so completely, that’s when you see what your ego really is. It’s raw, it’s ugly, but it’s yours. And from that moment on, you have a choice: you can let it keep running wild, or you can tame it, learn from it, and use it.
People don’t talk about the power of ego enough. They’re too busy demonizing it, trying to act like they’re somehow above it. Newsflash: no one’s above it. We all have it. And we all have to figure out what the hell to do with it. The trick is not letting it steer you off a cliff. The trick is understanding that it’s my ego that got me into some serious trouble, but it’s also my ego that gets me out of bed at 3 a.m. every day. It’s my ego that pushes me to be better, to want more, never to settle. Ego isn’t the enemy unless you make it your enemy.
Ego can be a tool. It’s like fire. You can burn yourself with it, or you can use it to light the path. It’s my ego that tells me I can handle whatever life throws at me. It’s my ego that reminds me of what I’ve survived, that I’ve come through the fire, and I’m still standing. There’s strength in that. There’s power in taking your ego and saying, “Alright, I see you. Now, let’s do something worthwhile with this.”
I’ve learned that it’s all about balance. You can’t let your ego lead, but you also can’t pretend it doesn’t exist. Are you trying to act like you’re ego-free? That’s just another form of ego. The people who talk the most about humility are often the ones most driven by their egos. True humility isn’t about denying your ego; it’s about understanding it. It’s about recognizing when it’s helping you and when it’s holding you back. Because when you know your ego and see it for what it is, you’re in control. Then, it’s your weapon, not your weakness.
When I say, “It’s my ego,” I’m not just talking about pride or confidence. I’m talking about that deep-rooted belief that I have something to prove. To myself, to the world, it doesn’t matter. Ego gives me purpose. Ego is that chip on my shoulder that drives me to push harder, go further, and dig deeper. It’s that part of me that says, “No one’s going to hand you anything. If you want it, you go out and take it.” And yeah, maybe that’s not what people want to hear. Maybe they want some feel-good speech about humility, kindness, and peace. But that’s not how the real world works. Out here, you need that fire. Out here, you need to know who you are and what you’re willing to fight for.
And ego, my ego, has taught me that. It’s taught me to get back up every time I fall. It’s taught me that no one is coming to save me, that I’m the one who has to do the work, who has to face the grind day after day. It’s my ego that fuels that discipline, that relentless drive to keep going when everything in me says quit. Because there are days, let’s be real, when quitting would be easy. Days when the weight of it all feels like too much. And it’s my ego that refuses to let me bow out.
But ego, when you’re not careful, also has a dark side. It’s that whisper that tells you you’re better than others, that you deserve more, and that you don’t need to put in the same work. Ego, unchecked, is dangerous. It’ll convince you that you’re above the rules and untouchable. It’ll isolate you and make you think you don’t need anyone else. And that’s when it’ll destroy you because no one’s untouchable. The moment you think you are, that’s the moment you’re setting yourself up to fall.
I learned that the hard way. I learned that there’s a fine line between confidence and arrogance, between believing in yourself and believing you’re invincible. And it’s my ego that had to be shattered before I could see the difference. I had to lose it all to understand that ego is like a virus when it’s just left to roam free. It infects everything, clouds your judgment, and makes you believe things that aren’t true. But when you harness it and learn to ride that line without crossing it, that’s where the power is.
Every time I lace up my shoes to run and hit the weights, my ego tells me to go harder, to push through the pain, to fight through the fatigue. And when I’m out there, drenched in sweat and exhausted, part of me knows it’s my ego I’m battling. Because it’s that voice that says, “You don’t need to do this. You’ve done enough.” But there’s another voice, the one I’ve worked hard to cultivate, that says, “Not yet. Keep going.” And that’s where I find my edge.
It’s my ego that reminds me of who I am, of what I’ve been through. It’s that reminder that I’m not here by accident and didn’t survive by luck. I survived because I fought and refused to be broken; every time life tried to tear me down, I came back stronger. And that, right there, that’s the beauty of ego when you control it, when you shape it instead of letting it shape you. It becomes a source of strength, not a weakness.
People like to say ego is a prison, but I don’t see it that way. I see it as a choice. You can let it trap you, or you can let it free you. And I choose freedom. I choose to take my ego, to look it dead in the eye, and say, “You don’t own me. I own you.” Because that’s what it’s all about. It’s about ownership. It’s about taking responsibility for that part of yourself, not pretending it’s something outside of you, something you can blame or escape from. It’s mine, and I own it. It’s my ego.
So, yeah, ego is a beast. It’s a wild thing, a dangerous thing. It can build you up with its fire or melt you down like an ice cube. But it’s also a gift. Because it’s that part of you that refuses to be ordinary, that part of you that demands more, that pushes you to be relentless, never to settle, to go all-in, every damn day. And if you can take that, if you can shape that, then there’s nothing that can stop you. Because you’ve faced the toughest opponent of all—you’ve faced yourself. And when you come out the other side, when you stand there, scars and all, that’s when you know you’re unstoppable. Because it’s your ego, and you own it.
Stay disciplined. Stay resilient.
Jim Lunsford
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